Wednesday, March 7, 2007

tired and bummy

I do not know really why. Probably because this medical stuff makes me anxious.
The tests are "the same". I wish the doctor would say, "you are fine, you are dismissed of my care" but he doesn't, he didn't and he did say "You and I, we are connected forever" or something like that. Dr. Rajendra is a really nice doctor but he needs to clean his saltwater aquarium. Aren't they supposed to be really clean? There were as usual lots of cancer people in the waiting room. They always look brave and confident.
Anyway... the tests are the same. All of the cancer markers are good/okay, but there is something called immunoglobulin M that stays really really high. So... it has been two years since I had every part of my body x-rayed (except my hands, feet and head), so I have to get a ... oh yeah, a sonogram of my liver spleen and kidneys lymph nodes and whatever just have an sono- fest... and I have to get a chest x-ray and more blood tests (every six months) I am sorry to depress you with all of this news. For me it is better to unload. I know there are other people suffering that are far worse off than me... Sometimes I joke around and say "I'm a walking time bomb" Like isn't everyone, sort of, in a sense? Anyway... I am feeling tired and bummy now, but I am the sort that snaps out of it eventually. Right now I am still heart poundy...
I do not know when I will get the radiology tests done. Dr. Rajendra said no hurry, just before my September visit... so maybe I will wait until it is warmer out. I don't know. I do not want to think about it.

Prinnie has been asking if she can have a blog. (Caesar has no interest in sharing his certainly not profound thoughts with the "innernets") Prinnie cannot type. She has a very difficult time expressing her feelings but she is a smarty. Is there a good "typing for cats" tutorial around? I have not been able to find anything for her. At first I thought she was interested in my comfort and company because she missed Blizzie so, but now I realize she has just been hanging around me to learn about my MacBookPro. I should get some pics of her in photobooth some day. anyway... I will think about a blog for her, this might be a whim, so I will see if the interest persists.

We have a camera and we have video-chats every Wednesday evening with my parents. They are quite computer savvy. My hubby taught them quite a lot but my dad is very intelligent.
So, I usually take screen shots while we talk. I must try to get happy and peppy for the chat this evening.

I hope you had the very best day.
I think tomorrow will be a better day for me. I just know it.
I know I will go to the rink and practice the new pattern. I do wear kneepads (because I love my knees very much) but yesterday I fell right on my left knee and I guess the knee pad shifted (not so good huh?) during the lesson. It did kinda hurt but I went on as usual. When I woke up this morning I discovered an owwie bruise. Maybe I need tighter fitting knee pads....

<3 you are loved by me
Be well

Life is divided up
into the horrible
and the miserable.

~~Woody Allen


5 comments:

Daisy said...

Rosemary, do not feel you are "unloading" on us because that is why it is good to have friends - to share the good times, the bad times, and the worries. I think if we worry just a little for you, then you will not have to worry so much yourself. My shoulders might look skinny, but they can carry a lot of worries without bending at all! I think I could be a little bit like supercat that way.

I think Prinnie would like a blog! Or, maybe she can just post on yer blog sometimes. Anyway, I like looking at Prinnie and Caesar's pictures because there are not many curly cats on the internet! And they are cute!

Tara said...

That is what blogs are for, Rosemary, to share your feelings when needed. I'm sending you all my meezer energy. And don't listen to Woody Allen...

Mom has a MacBookPro too! As for cats typing, I dictate to Mom, so I haven't had to learn. When she is on travel, I do it over the little box she somehow squeezes into. Mom and I spent several months reading blogs before I convinced her to let me try. We have been having lots of fun, its a great release!

Tara

mister jeter harris, hizself said...

O'jete's mom here.
The blog is the place to "unload". I find that I'm feeling more and more connected to all the bloggers...and that includes you, Rosemary! So just know that you have friends here who are thinking of you ... and praying for you.
love--rh

Lux said...

Oh Rosemary, you be well, also. What you're going through isn't something someone should carry alone.

And curly cats *are cute!

We care lots,
Lux & Mom

LZ said...

((hugs)) You can always talk to your kitty friends, I promise I'll always purr while you tell me your problems- I always do that for my LL. Anything medical is scary so its best to get it off your chest and share with your friends. (The Lap Lady has a TOP SECRET blog she uses to unload and say nasty things.)

Kaze

Cat blogging is fun!! It really helps you get away from your world and see life through the eyes of your precious companions. ~the LL